When Katie Catt met her ex-partner, Tony*, online in 2014, she recalls him being a kind, genuine dad-of-two. Then everything changed.
After a whirlwind four months, Tony proposed – and with this next level of commitment came a shocking torrent of violent and abusive behavior that blindsided Katie.
‘He became possessive of me straight away,’ the 45-year-old Londoner tells Metro. ‘The first assault was after I was late getting to his house. He went through my phone,
That day, Katie left Tony, telling him she would never be with an abusive partner.
‘He said he was sorry, and that it would never happen again,’ she recalls. ‘I gave him a second chance. But over the years, the abuse escalated. I kept leaving him, but he always convinced me to come back. I remember he would say that his children missed me. He used it as an excuse to get me to stay.’
Katie had reported Tony’s abuse early on in the relationship – the same year she met him – but he convinced her that they just needed a fresh start. He promised he would change.
‘So I dropped the case,’ she says. ‘The abuse started again straight away. It was horrendous. I was petrified of him.’
Often, Katie would show up to work with bruises all over her body – which left her colleagues shocked. ‘But I couldn’t go back to my family. I felt too much shame. Like I was a fool for going back to him, and deserved it in a way.’
In May 2016, Katie finally planned her escape, with the help of her parents, who were aware of the abuse but didn’t realise just how bad it had become.
This Is Not Right
On November 25, 2024 Metro launched This Is Not Right, a year-long campaign to address the relentless epidemic of violence against women.
With the help of our partners at Women’s Aid, This Is Not Right aims to shine a light on the sheer scale of this national emergency.
You can find more articles here, and if you want to share your story with us, you can send us an email at vaw@usnewsrank.com.
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‘The only way I could think of getting away was to go on holiday with Tony,’ she explains. ‘I gave my mum the keys to our house so she could get everything of mine while we were gone. When we got back, I told him I was leaving him because, otherwise, he’d kill me.’
However, after moving back in with her parents, Katie found out she was pregnant.
‘I didn’t want to be in a relationship with him, but I wanted him to be there for our child,’ she says. Yet, despite no longer being in a relationship together, Tony abused Kate more than ever during pregnancy.
‘He made me register at a hospital close to him then when I changed it, refused to attend any appointments,’ she says. ‘He also kept pushing me to be intimate with him. I blocked him, but he’d use his friend’s phone, sending pictures of his kids and saying they missed me.’
In July 2017, when her babywas six months old, Katie decided to report the abuse, with the help of the domestic abuse charity Solace.
What followed was a six-year wait for justice. It wasn’t until October 2024 that Tony was found guilty on three charges of Actual Bodily Harm (ABH) as well as Coercive and Controlling behavior.
On three other charges brought by CPS for Attempted Rape, Rape, and Sexual Assault, Tony was found ‘not guilty’ when the case went to trial. He was given four years imprisonment and slapped with a restraining order for ten years.
It was an unbearable wait for Katie, but she isn’t the only one to have spent years to see justice. Many domestic abuse survivors have had to wait a long time for their Crown Court cases to conclude.
Alison Ruby, a woman who reported childhood rape in 2019, was forced to wait five years for her trial. During this time, her perpetrator died and key witnesses disappeared.
‘I was angry that he’d got away with it because the process had taken so long,’ Alison later said. ‘If they’d have done it sooner, he would have at least been punished for a little while. He got away scot-free.’
One of the primary reasons it takes so long for victims to get justice is down to Crown Court backlogs.
There are nearly 77,000 cases waiting to be heard in the Crown Court, according to the Ministry of Justice – a number that has risen 11% in just one year. On average, victims are waiting 271 days for their cases to be resolved, 70% longer than before the Covid-19 pandemic.
‘This Government inherited a record and growing courts backlog which is why we are looking at once-in-a-generation reforms to tackle delays and deliver swifter justice,’ a government spokesperson from the MoJ tells Metro.
A March 2025 report on the impacts on victims of lengthy court delays found that many who have heard news that their trial dates are delayed and rescheduled, are tempted to give up on their pursuit of justice,
Meanwhile, the number of rape victims who have pulled out of prosecutions before trial has more than doubled in five years amid the delays in the courts.
In the Victims Commissioner report, Victim’s Commissioner Baroness Newlove said: ‘These delays don’t just prolong the process – they deepen the trauma. Victims’ lives are put on hold, relationships are strained, and their jobs and prospects are threatened. Justice should never come at such a cost.’
Earlier this month, it was announced that extra money will be allocated for the courts in a bid to end backlogs.
‘We’re funding a record 111,250 Crown Court sitting days this year and providing additional investment in the courts of up to £450m per year by 2028-29,’ the MoJ spokesperson tells Metro, noting that this money is still being allocated. ‘We remain committed to halving violence against women and girls and have maintained funding levels for sexual violence and domestic abuse support this year.’
While the charity Victim’s Support’s Chief Executive Katie Kempen welcomes the announcement, she’s worried about the lack of support for victims who are still waiting for justice.
‘With the backlog at a record high, many victims are still facing years of uncertainty, trauma and delay,’ she tells Metro. ‘Increasing court capacity is essential, but it must be matched by properly funded support services to help victims cope and recover during these long waits for justice.
‘Victims’ services have faced significant funding cuts over the past year. If the government is serious about delivering justice, it must commit to sustained investment in the services that support victims through the long and difficult journey to trial.’
Survivor Katie says the high turnover of police assigned to her case, lack of available judges and barrister strikes was why the court case took so long to conclude.
‘It really affected my mental health having to relive what happened so often,’ she says. ‘Some of the police were lovely, but others made me lose faith in the process. They didn’t fill me with any confidence to the point I wondered why I was continuing with the process.’
She describes feeling ‘stuck’ and unable to move on while the case slowly continued on, losing jobs because she had to miss days for police appointments, or because she wasn’t mentally functioning.
Josie Holden Wilby, Head of Operations for Community Services at Solace Women’s Aid, tells Metro that delay in the courts have a unique impact on domestic abuse survivors.
‘The long delays can lead to survivors living in a state of anxiety and hypervigilance, which can in term have a huge psychological and physical impact,’ she explains.
‘It can affect how someone engages with their everyday life, whether that is education, work, family life, parenting, childcare. Someone also might not feel fully safe until there is a conviction, again creating anxiety, stress and fear.’
Josie adds that some survivors have even said that the drawn out court process feels worse than the abuse – a combination of not feeling believed by professionals, fearing shame if the perpetrator is found not-guilty, and having special measures in court ignored.
Katie says that fear followed her everywhere for years when she thought about Tony finding her as the case continued: ‘I was afraid to walk out of the house,’ she remembers.
Although she lived in London, she was made to travel miles to her ex’s local police office and court in Kent, which ‘put additional stress’ on her.
‘It made me angry and disheartened because my life was on hold. I felt so down and lost sight of what I was putting myself through it. But then I reminded myself I’d gotten this far. I had to continue.’
In October last year, Katie finally received the phone call she’d been waiting for – Tony had been sentenced. While relieved, it was as a ‘kick in the teeth’ when she found out he’d be released for two months to await sentencing.
‘He could still find me if he had tried,’ she says. ‘Bail conditions wouldn’t stop anyone if they were angry enough. I was told to just report anything if it happened, but I was constantly recalling the threats in your head and watching over your shoulder. I was and still am afraid of him hurting me.’
Even so, Katie is glad she saw her harrowing case through. ‘I had done it and I could finally start moving on,’ she says. ‘But it’s disgusting that it took so long to go through the courts.’
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